Doing Things Right In Matters of the Heart 5

Chapter Six of John Ensor's book Doing Things Right In Matters of the Heart is entitled "He Initiates...She Responds." I am sure I will possibly get labeled a male chauvinist pig in response to these excerpts, but men and women who follow this advice and practice it in their marriages, will find much more joy than those who do not. If agreement with the advice below makes me a male chauvinist pig in the eyes of the world, oh well. "Oink!"

Brothers, it falls to us to be the initial risk takers in matters of the heart. Headship means being the one to go ahead and ask. It is ours as men to suffer the embarrassment of rejection if need be. It is our role to initiate. It is hers to respond with a signal of reception or rejection. Get to it merrily. We are the hunters . They are the quarry. It is for men to strike out into the forest and look. It is for women to crack the twigs, and stir the leaves so we know where to find them.

Sisters, all the advice from Vogue, Glamour, and Cosmopolitan that talks about going after and getting your man, all the blather about how in this day and age it is just as acceptable for you to initiate as for him—is just that—blather. The proof is that it feels wrong. Be confident and trust your feelings on this matter. Be confident that if he is the man you hope and wish him to be, he will play the man. You crackle the leaves a bit when he is in the area and let him know you are there. Then wait for him to initiate, or not. In the long run, you will be well served either way.