Doing Things Right In Matters of the Heart 10

Chapter Ten of John Ensor's book Doing Things Right In Matters of the Heart is entitled, "He Abstains to Protect...She, To Test." In this chapter Ensor shows how chastity on the part of the man is a means of protecting the woman and expecting chastity of the man is an effective tool to filter out the kind of man a woman shouldn't marry.

"Men protect women by their chastity. Women, by their chastity, test the maturity and character of the man pursuing them.”

“Brothers, practice sexual self-control out of a desire to protect her from sin, guilt, shame, embarrassment, pregnancy, and the fallout that all women bear so disproportionately from sex outside of marriage.”

“The immature, self-centered, ungodly man will test negative in a matter of weeks. The deceitful and cunning predator will test negative in a matter of days. Men willing to wait, and wanting to wait, will test positive. It is not a lack of sexual interest: it is a healthy fear of God. It is love, which at this point rightfully expresses itself as protection from sin and shame. If he weakens, help him succeed. If all else goes well in the development of the relationship, you know you are marrying a godly man, one who has self-control and a clear sense of his calling as a man.”